Monthly Archives: December 2014

Life matters

New year

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Wishing all my fellow bloggers around the world happy healthy lives in 2015. Blogging was something I started in January 2014 as a New Year’s resolution with the Zero to Hero Challenge and it’s been quite a ride.

I’ve read inspiring, challenging, annoying, interesting, thought provoking, sad and funny posts. Thanks to all.

I’ve been inspired by the all the photography blogs and loved to see people’s contributions to various photo challenges. So creative.

I’ve shared thoughts, feelings and ideas over the year – blogging saw me through the painful loss of my mother and I so appreciated the kind support of people in the blogging community. Empathy abounded.

And mostly I’ve loved participating in the photo challenges – reading the theme of the week and either taking shots to fit the theme or trawling back in my folders.

Blogging has become a part of my life in 2014 and I look forward to much more in the year ahead. Thank you for the part you play in that.

Here’s to us!

This is how I want my 2015 to be:

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Life matters

Sad news

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I learned recently of the very sudden unexpected death of a former work colleague’s husband, a man full of life and vigour. Early 50s and he and his wife, my friend, were just embarking on the children grown up and away, next phase of their lives. A new home, a full new life ahead of them both. And now suddenly not. A new life ahead for her and not one she would have ever imagined.

My heart goes out to her on the eve of the funeral, saying farewell to someone she saw herself having so many years ahead with. A space now in her life, huge, gaping. I feel for her pain tomorrow and the days, weeks and months ahead and for her two children. We’re never old enough to lose a parent.

To lose someone at this time of year where every magazine, radio or tv show are in full festivity mode is even tougher. Though always unbearable whatever time of year.

I held my partner tight when I heard the news. Who knows how long we have but I am reminded to savour each moment as if it could be our last, to make it a good contributing loving life full of everyday kindnesses and generosity to each other. To never regret last words being harsh or things left unsaid. To have love be what we remember most.

Life matters

A reflective time

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Christmas approaches. Wild purchasing everywhere. Shops competing with bigger and bigger discounts and price matching. Harassed looking parents with bulging supermarket trolleys and reluctant children in tow. A sense of desperation almost in the air. Will we get it all done in time?

So there’s all of that. And there’s also all around me people talking fondly of family time over Christmas, the board games dusted down from the year before, giggling at the stories that get remembered every Christmas, watching favourite old movies and laughing or shedding a tear in the same places. Lovely to hear people at work talking about this time with young families or the first Christmas their grown up children will be coming home for the celebrations.

Others are planning to help out at the various homeless charities to make a contribution. While others again just ignoring the whole thing.

For us it’s part of a family coming together to make this as good a first Christmas after my mother’s death as we can for our father. Going somewhere different, a country cottage, board games, Christmas pudding, a decorated tree and a visit to the nearby church for some. The first of a new way to celebrate Christmas and be a family.

Mum never was a great fan of Christmas though she liked having her family about her. I remember her making mince pies while listening to Kings College Cambridge choirs singing carols on the radio. The aroma soon filling the house. The first bite while one was still warm. Unforgettable. I can almost smell and taste it now.

We will remember her this first Christmas without her and think of others who will be missing people they love too. It’s a tough time for many. And as Dad lights the indoor fireworks, an old indulgence of his, we’ll remember mum’s disgust at the annual smelly event and her loud sighed “Oh Timothy… Must you?” .

We’ll be looking back fondly and missing mum. Yet we will also be building our new way of spending Christmas, different bits of the family, new memories, new stories with our father. Precious times.

Wishing you all well over this holiday time whatever it means for you.